Friday, May 23, 2014


It would have been a great pleasure if I had the chance to meet Nelson Mandela, the father of African democracy in my lifetime. Mandela is a hero, an icon, and a liberator whose memory will stay with the world forever. More and more children will be born and will be named Mandela, oblivious of the struggles the world leader walked through. His path was rough and rugged. A road we never want to travel again as global citizens.

Mandela’ long battle with death began in August 2013. He fought back. Perhaps it was due to the spotlight that surrounded him at that moment. Hungry journalists hovering around the corridors hoping to be the first to run the breaking headline “Mandiba Goodbye!”. The timing of his demise would never be right.

The world was united in grief and mourning an icon, a bacon of peace, a Nobel prize winner who taught many the art of forgiveness and the need of unity and good leadership.
Mandela carried the headlines. Media houses sang his praises. Broadcasted his documentaries and films, “A Hero’s long struggle from apartheid”  “The father of African democracy” Mandela this, Mandela that. All of it hypocritical just to sell their publications and get the hungry masses glued to their live broadcasts. Many wanted to be associated with him. Those who had had the chance to meet him changed their profile photos to the one next to him and bragged on their social media timelines. The rest like me “photo shopped” (is that the word?) just to appear relevant! Don’t get me wrong. It is a shitty world and relevance is all that matters. World leaders hitched air force one to the city under the sun to pay their last respect. A legacy and lifeline of their political career! Thousands of both local and international residents gathered in Pretoria to bid farewell to Tata Mandiba. Each one with their selfish personal reason attached. Hypocrisy  was the epicenter of it all!

I admired Mandela. He was many things. Not any feet can fit into his shoe. But Mandela was also human. He erred, not once. As a husband and a father his scorecard was pitiful.. “But I was in jail for 28 damn years!” I thank you, South Africa thanks you and the world fetes you.

But Tata mandiba, your first wife Eveline, left because you were never home Mr. Mandela, God rest her soul in peace. I can imagine the frustrations she went through. Cooking her best recipes that went untouched, buying that red silky sexy lingerie and no one was around to tell her how beautiful and damn sexy she looked in it. Artificial insomnia coupled up with anxiety and a need that kept her awake all night, I would not be surprised if she caught some form of LONELY WOMAN SYNDROME disease. Mr. Mandela was never home! South Africa needed to be liberated! After a whirlwind of disappointments she decided to throw in the towel. After 14 years of loneliness and trying to overlook Mandela’s flaws, she bailed.
Barely months out of his failed marriage, a marriage where he sired 3 children, Mandela married Winnie Medikizela in 1958. It was a church ceremony. Wedding bells ringing from each corner, pretty women all made up waiting to receive Mandela’s next bride. But wait a minute, did Mandela cheat on his wife before the divorce? Did Eveline leave because of Winnie?
Evaline had to get to work the next day after a night from hell. She probably had to wear oversized black dark glasses to conceal the swollen lines beneath her red eyes. Mandela damaged Eve and left her broken and empty. Many would say that polygamy was accepted then in South Africa. How fast he moved on is what shocks me.

Enter Nonzamo Winnie Madikizela. A woman of steel. I respect this woman with every fibre of my female being. She championed the struggle to free Mandela. She kept the liberation dream alive while fighting for her husband’s freedom.  Winnie never enjoyed time with Mandela. She was harassed, jailed because of Mandela. I still believe without Winnie Mandela South Africans would have forgotten Mandela and he would have never left that island. Fast Rewind………. Before she met Rolihiahia Mandela, Winnie’s life was perfect. She went to a good school, got a perfect grades and a dream job to cream up her crème life. She dreamt of falling in love with the perfect man and having perfect children.

Mandela sold his dreams to Winnie maybe on a dinner date. Winnie bought it. She was fascinated by his beliefs and swore to stand by him. Bore him children and became his wife. She waited for Mandela for 28 years, fought for his freedom and keeping his memory alive. She was there when he was released from jail. She helped him walk to freedom. But as soon as he was installed as the president of the federal republic of South Africa? He dumped Winnie soon enough denying Winnie the dream where everything ended with perfect, FIRST LADY. This is inhuman.

He should have been a little considerate and write her a note stating that he intends to dump her as soon as he occupied the house on the hill. The lawn is always greener here.  This is the dream that made Medikizela fight for years. They say hope is feathered and she flew, she dreamt of furnishing the house on the hill with her favorite colors maybe orange and brown, blue and pink, *Shrug*, who knows, buy kitchenware of her choice, She dreamt of buying linen from Egypt, host dinner for visiting first families from across the world. She wanted to be the envy of every South African female. She had it all written down in their perfect wonderful script. It was designed in her mind until Mandela crushed it! He killed her dream. Mandela never fought for Winnie. He never defended her DREAM. He walked away!

It’s like a reading an amazing novel that keeps you enchanted until the prince falls in love with the frog. What I realized is in the real world, the princess never gets the prince.  I believe a dream assassin is equivalent to an assassin. How can the world be blind this kind of atrocity that Mandela committed to the female kind?

Mandela left Winnie for Graca.

A woman blessed enough to be married to two sitting presidents from different countries. Just when did Graca realize she was in love with Mandela? Maybe if Mandela were not a global sensation, she would have never set her eyes on him. Was this luck or a clear calculation? Graca finally became Mandela’s third wife. She irked Winnie in every wrong way. Winnie resented her. She had stolen her dream and made it her reality. She stole her man too. She chilled Winnie to the core that she even nick named her “STATE CONCUBINE”. What was Graca’s role in Mandela’s life? What did she seek to achieve? She has decorated state house many a times before. She has bore presidential children.  She has hosted state parties. Was this not enough? Did she have to live Winnie’s dream again?

Mandela, fare thee well, a man who wrongly stirred the female world